a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize