Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
