turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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