nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize