Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
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I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
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You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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