For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
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can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
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Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize