Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
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