Whats the glycemic index on semen?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize