doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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