just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
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