Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
