Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
