Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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