Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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