we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I need to calm my uterus...
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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