I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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