Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
I used to kick so much ass
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
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Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
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it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.