You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
