My hand turned me down
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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