your parents love me but you hate me
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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