well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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