so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
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