Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
