Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
