when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
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