He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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