morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
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