You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
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