I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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