At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize