I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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