Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
