yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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