Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
