Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
this will be a night to untag.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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