we're blogging at a bar
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize