ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
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