Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Randomize