I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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