I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize