i don't plan on having that self control this summer
my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
love makes seman taste better
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
