They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize