Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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