There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Randomize
