I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
