The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
