her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
