The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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