This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
