whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
