Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
